Hajat

I never told anyone about this.

I don't remember when, but it was a long time ago. I have a yearn, deep in my heart. I said to myself,
 " I want to wear the purdah (face veil) one day " .

One day, when I'm ready. But even before wearing that, I must prepare myself. Just like wearing the hijab, I feel that if I want to wear it now, I will not take it off in public or in front of non relatives. I have to cover my aurat properly. I have to avoid doing the wrong things that Allah has forbid. I don't want to cheat when others don't see me (not any more)...because Allah always see me. I hate hypocrites but I am one. Sometimes when I did something wrong, I forget that Allah is watching my every move. It scares me when I realised that I don't think of Allah 24/7 in my life. But now, each time I have an attempt to do wrong, I hope I have time to stop myself. I want to be a better muslimah.

Pray that I will get hidayah from Allah to tell me, its time. I want to do it now, but I want to take things slow. Perbetulkan apa yang salah dulu. Then, insya'Allah, I'd be able to wear the purdah by the time I get married. ;)