die Schönheit

I guess I was trying to find the good in everything. And if you're searching for something good, insya'Allah Allah will lead the way for us.

I'm blessed and grateful for friends and family for their support in which I will never be able to go through anything without Allah's and their help. Alhamdulillah.

Its my first time to perform Solat Istikharah. Tenang. Its like you're ready for Allah to give answers and having that connection and special bond is more than enough for me. Alhamdulillah. Pray for me. Pray for my peace of mind.

Before that, I was like having PMS for a week. Moodswings and anxiety stuff. And its not even 'that time of month' yet. Haihh.

I went for a jog with Zati last night. Yes, at night. Petang taksempat pun. On that wide open field in Jeli Campus, its really clear to find stars. After a few rounds jogging we sat there and talk and try to recognize the stars. I wish I could just lie there and look at the stars, looking at Allah's great creations. Subhanallah cantik.

You might say, "Alah, bintang je pun." For a city girl like me, its so hard to just ease up and find the time to look up at the sky. Lampu terang sangat kat bandar.
Its like a real diamond in the sky. I wish I could share the moment with my loved ones, just breathe the fresh air and look at the beautiful stars. I could actually feel myself smiling.

One night after picking up Lissa from tuition,
Lissa: Angah, come outside, I wanna show you something.
Me: What? *goes outside*
Lissa: Okay, you stand here, face this side okay Angah?
*Lissa positioning me*
Lissa: Now look up. Do you see what I see?
Me: Wahh
Lissa: Do you know the names Angah?
Me: Not really. But I think that three straight stars lining up is the Orion's Belt.
Lissa: Yes it is. *She started drawing empty lines on the sky, trying to connect the dots and make shapes and finally found the guy with bow and arrow*

An interest sparked in me that night. I wish I could see the stars every night. I wish to be able to identify and name most of those stars. Pastu boleh tunjuk kat Lissa (:

Stargaze with me, bucuk?

Amelia

Genius

Here's an honest thought from me.
I have always thought that creating an outfit has its own similarities with creating a dish.
I mean, in an outfit, you will always have one piece of clothing that shines which the rest of the clothing pieces just compliments it; with the awesome color, right way to wear and the right accessories.

In cooking, there's always a main thing in a dish. Chicken, Fish, Meat, Broth or even Pasta. There's gonna be one that shines and the flavor in it compliments the main with side stuff that enhances the taste. Kinda like accessories for clothes.

Here I'm comparing an outfit with a dish. hah. If I can be good at putting together the perfect outfit, then, does that mean I can make great dishes too?

If only it would be that easy. Maybe that's Wafi's corner to mix food. Let me play with clothes. Wheee :P

Amelia

goodbye.

one. make a list.
two. do everything on the list.
three. be free.
check.

Assalamualaikum 2014

*fireworks*
I guess its a little bit too late to wish a Happy New Year to you guys? haha
New years was in the middle of finals. So, I dare not contemplate on the things I did in 2013 on midnight.
Basically, I delayed my New Years after my exams. Boleh ke? Yeshhh 'cause I'm a wizard.

It's Time by Imagine Dragons.

If you see this post : Dear 2013, I have 7 things to achieve and maintain last year.
I achieved 5 /7 of those things. Yeay~~~~~~~squiggly lines

I scrolled and saw my old posts and smiled. Wow, that's everything that had happened in 2013. I'm sure there's more that wasn't documented. Either way, I'm proud of myself. I deserve a pat on my back. Hehe.

I realised that in the year of 2013 I keep on rediscovering myself again and again. I try to read more and eager to learn more. I am not just that average girl. I finally have a clearer view on my dream. Just in 2013, I changed my dream for 3 times. Gila? Taklah. We are inconsistent. That's why we're human. I make mistakes. I feel these mixed emotions and feelings and desires. And I'm proud to be a girl name Nora Amelia. Embracing yourself much? (:

So, what did I learn in 2013 ?

1. I learn to enlarge my dream and invest in myself and the things I love. Enlarge your dream as big as you can and engrave it in your heart. Insya'Allah, Allah permudahkan.
2. I learn that everything will be okay when you talk to Allah. 
3. I learn to listen better. Listen to things that people are trying to say by their expressions and actions. Listen to nature. Basically, I learn to observe and use my senses as well.
4. I learn that whatever you do, do it as if its your last time. After I learn this, I hugged Ummi and my sisters a little longer and more often. What can I say; I'm a hugger.
5. Count blessings everyday.
6. I found courage. I didn't backdown. We won UNESCO Debate.
7. I learn to be rational and buy things only when we need to. Appreciate more.
8. I like ice skating. I plan to indulge myself in the things I love a little bit more. Bowling, Writing, Reading, Rock Climbing? Lets try that.

Alhamdulillah. That's basically the brief summary of what I learn.

What do I hope to have in 2014?

Happiness.

Well, basically I want happiness everyday in my life all year round. This is basically what I want to be when I grow up. I want to be happy. What do I wanna do when I grow up? I want to give confidence to people with their appearances and help them embrace themselves. That's what I wanna do. Occupation will not define who I am. I define myself.

Your time starts now, Amelia. 

Thoughts on 'Thoughts'

These few hours I’ve been inspired by these thoughts and wonderful ideas that just made me even more excited about life and all around.

Instead of being depressed and trying to find the true meaning of life, why don’t you just go and live that life and question the whole world on things and how they’re done. Life isn’t going to give you a one sentence text like, “Life is finding joy”. Life doesn’t have a phone to call or text you to even converse.

Life is going to be a compilation of answers when you ask that question to the world “Why?”. And you won’t know that true meaning of your life…when you don’t ask those questions. Duh. You know I was going to say that, right?

And this is the problem of the mentality of people, they don’t ask questions; they receive and accept everything without any doubt that it might be untrue in so many levels. 

Though most of you have heard or known about this, I’ve known and accepted this fact. But I never actually apply it in my daily life. It’s not that I wanted to unquestion things but it’s because of unpracticed methods in my conversations and arguments lead me to accepting everything. Making me naïve to most stuff.

Yet, sometimes you know you’re right and you don’t want to go through all that fight and throwing spineless words. Unnecessary things are basically unnecessary. 

Though in debate, you’ll find people finding facts (or creating facts) just so they could know who has the greater opinion on things. They gave words with spine that could stand tall. Frankly, debating is not a fair game to play. The “so-called” winners of the debate is being judged or adjudicated by people who may or may not be on your side. They win because you’re so good at convincing people or do you win because the jugde is on your side? Who are you to judge? See how I’m making things feel pointless and insignificant? What matters most is your own opinions and your own opinions are beautiful as it is. That does not change who you are. So, don’t.

I know my words and sentences may be messy. That’s just how my unedited mind works. It brings out ideas and pop into this blog that you’re reading. Hoping that you’ll be able to relate how my mind works. Disagree on my thoughts? Maybe I should go read your blog and find ways to relate to it. How are humans having same organs like brains and other body part be called similar when we all have different minds and opinion on things? 

Oh I love the irony. We are technically the same but with different minds which makes us an individual with different aspirations in life.

Amelia

7.45pm 11th January 2014

*Inspired by Tavi Gevinson, Logan LaPlante and Jacob Barnett.